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The Law Office of Lisa A. Vance, P.C.

The Path to Your Piece of Mind
Divorce and Family Law Matters

We are now accepting clients statewide in Texas.

WE ARE WORKING!

As the situation with COVID-19 continues to develop and evolve, the safety, health and well-being of our clients and our team is extremely important to us. We are watching for the guidance of the Centers for Disease Control and international medical experts to learn how we can best manage our facility and our clients.

We would like to reassure you that The Law Office of Lisa A. Vance, P.C. will continue to be available to provide services to all of our clients.

Our lawyers and paralegals are working in the office and electronically, although most of us are working from home. Below is a list of FAQs regarding our response and commitment to you during COVID-19.

Can I even have a consultation with my lawyer remotely?

Yes, The Office of Lisa A. Vance, P.C. has a comprehensive remote working capability and all of our lawyers and paralegals are equipped to work securely from home.

Will my lawyer be available to answer questions and work on my case?

Yes, your legal matters will continue to receive our attention. You can email, call, or videoconference with your lawyer during this time.

We also have multiple videoconferencing options; please contact your attorney for the platform that works best for you

How are court hearings and appointments affected?

Court in Bexar County are now conducted by Zoom Please see our blog article Court via Zoom: It’s Actually, Really Court (and Here’s How It Works)

Can I consult with a lawyer about a new family law or divorce matter?

Yes, we have office staff working in house and remotely to ensure continuity in our business. For information about a family law or divorce matter, please call our office or complete the Request a Consultation Form.

Your family law matters remain our top concern and we are not going to permit this pandemic to take priority over your needs. We will remain confident, alert and prepared.

We wish you and your family well as we work through this difficult situation together.

With warm regards,
Lisa A Vance

 

 

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Why words matter (even after your divorce or breakup)

| Feb 9, 2018 | Post-Divorce |

When a couple decides to get divorced, they’re immediately expected to abide by a set of guidelines called Standing Orders. In Bexar County, these guidelines, like in many other jurisdictions, address the manner in which the parties speak to each other and interact with each other.

That’s important, because words can be especially powerful when people are in the incredibly emotional process of a divorce. Standing Orders make sure that words aren’t used to be threatening or hurtful, and that’s of paramount importance in navigating a divorce.

But what about afterward? Once a couple is divorced, and the Standing Orders no longer apply, does a couple have to continue to mind their words?

If a couple who has divorced have children together, and therefore must continue to interact, they most definitely do. This need to have civil discourse also applies in cases where two people who never married, but had a child together, have to negotiate co-parenting.

There are a few reasons it’s important for parents to mind their words after they’re no longer together.

The first and most important one is the well-being of the children. Children can perceive tension, and though some might be too young to catch the exact meaning of everything you’re saying, they can certainly sense when words are being used as weapons. Divorce decrees are, by design, intended to provide as much stability for children as possible-but if parents aren’t maintaining the decorum needed to keep that stability, it pulls the rug out from under their children.

Another reason that watching one’s words is important is that, for divorced parents, negotiations don’t stop with the divorce decree. People’s lives change after divorce-people get new jobs, move to new neighborhoods, and maybe even find new partners. Not every change requires a modification to the divorce decree, of course. But parents must account for the changes, and they must work together to keep stability for their children even with the changes. If parents aren’t keeping their words civil, that only complicates the negotiations that need to take place.

Finally, if you’re resorting to angry or hurtful words in communication with your ex-spouse, it likely indicates unresolved feelings about the divorce. It’s perfectly normal to experience hurt and loss even after a divorce is final. It’s also certainly normal to encounter frustrations with an ex, given that those frustrations might come from the same differences of opinion that contributed to the end of your marriage. But if you hang on to the anger and hurt from a divorce, it will make it more difficult for you to get past the divorce and into a healthy and fulfilling post-divorce life.

For those people, we offer the same advice we give to our clients in the throes of emotional divorces or breakups-find a counselor you can trust and can relate to, and work things out there. Doing so can not only help you recover from a challenging breakup-certainly not an easy or simple thing to do-but can help you get to a better place in dealing with your ex, and therefore providing a more stable foundation for your children.

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