FIERCE COMPASSIONATE LAWYERS
The Law Office of Lisa A. Vance, P.C.

The Path to Your Piece of Mind
Divorce and Family Law Matters

We are now accepting clients statewide in Texas.

WE ARE WORKING!

As the situation with COVID-19 continues to develop and evolve, the safety, health and well-being of our clients and our team is extremely important to us. We are watching for the guidance of the Centers for Disease Control and international medical experts to learn how we can best manage our facility and our clients.

We would like to reassure you that The Law Office of Lisa A. Vance, P.C. will continue to be available to provide services to all of our clients.

Our lawyers and paralegals are working in the office and electronically, although most of us are working from home. Below is a list of FAQs regarding our response and commitment to you during COVID-19.

Can I even have a consultation with my lawyer remotely?

Yes, The Office of Lisa A. Vance, P.C. has a comprehensive remote working capability and all of our lawyers and paralegals are equipped to work securely from home.

Will my lawyer be available to answer questions and work on my case?

Yes, your legal matters will continue to receive our attention. You can email, call, or videoconference with your lawyer during this time.

We also have multiple videoconferencing options; please contact your attorney for the platform that works best for you

How are court hearings and appointments affected?

Court in Bexar County are now conducted by Zoom Please see our blog article Court via Zoom: It’s Actually, Really Court (and Here’s How It Works)

Can I consult with a lawyer about a new family law or divorce matter?

Yes, we have office staff working in house and remotely to ensure continuity in our business. For information about a family law or divorce matter, please call our office or complete the Request a Consultation Form.

Your family law matters remain our top concern and we are not going to permit this pandemic to take priority over your needs. We will remain confident, alert and prepared.

We wish you and your family well as we work through this difficult situation together.

With warm regards,
Lisa A Vance

 

 

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How do I make back-to-school time less anxious for my kids during divorce?

| Aug 16, 2019 | Children In Divorce, Emotional Support And Divorce |

This is the time of year when children are about to go back to school – or, if your children are in SAISD, they already have! It’s a time of change. In some cases, it’s a big change, moving from elementary to middle school or middle school to high school. Even for those children staying in the same school, back-to-school time represents a shift from the relatively carefree days of summer to the hubbub of school.

Change can cause stress, of course, especially in children. And when children experience divorce with their parents, the change in routines combines with the sense of loss they feel to create incredible stress. As parents, it’s important that you try to lessen the stress for your children as much as you possibly can. While you’re experiencing stress yourself, you have more agency over the situation, not to mention better-developed coping skills.

This article from the Johns Hopkins Medical website has some great tips for helping children with back-to-school anxiety. The first tip they give is perhaps the most useful – a week or two before school starts, establish a routine that resembles what your children will have during the school year. That means bedtimes close to their school-year bedtimes, selecting the next day’s clothes, making lunches, and whatever other night-before and morning-of tasks make sense.

For children experiencing divorce, that should go one step further, with both parents meeting or at least emailing to make sure the routine’s synched between both houses. Depending on the parenting plan you work with during and after the divorce, you’ll have to get children used to what night they’re at which house. Having an identical routine in place – or at least, as similar to each other as possible – will bring some welcome order to their schedules.

Conversely, if Mom’s enforcing 9 pm bedtimes and Dad’s letting them stay up until 11 pm on the nights the children are with him, it’s hard for children to establish a routine – plus children who might be resistant to the earlier bedtime might see Mom as the “mean” parent for enforcing an earlier bedtime and Dad as the “cool” parent for letting them stay up late. That’s not fair to Mom or, ultimately, the children.

One tip seemed especially helpful for younger children going to a new school. They suggest:

Visit the school before the school year begins, rehearse the drop-off and spend time on the playground or inside the classroom if the building is open. Have the child practice walking into class while the parent waits outside or down the hall.

That allows your child to get a mental snapshot of the school, and it also eliminates some of the fear of the unknown that comes with a new school. (It also could be helpful to take photos and video of the school on your phone, to have it for reference between the time you visit and the time school starts.)

Rehearsing drop off also gives the child a sense of how long it takes to get to school and what he or she will see along the way. We have a great ability as humans to memorize how to move through a physical space, such as the rooms of a house you live in, or the route you take from your home to your workplace. Even if your child might not be able to give directions from home to school, it will look and feel more familiar to your child as he or she travels it.

This is also a good thing for your spouse to do when he or she has the children. It helps establish the routine they’ll have at each house, and also provides some reassurance. Even though the child will start a day at either household, the route will end at the same school and the routine of class schedules there.

Remember that even without divorce, back-to-school time can be an anxious time. It’s an important time to be understanding and loving, to ask about your children’s days, to be present to answer questions and give advice. It’s also a good time to go out with your kids for ice cream! Showing that you can be together and do something that’s a treat – be it ice cream or whatever signifies a special bonding time for you and your children – will further reinforce that everything will be all right despite the chaos and change in the air.

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